A Distorted View on Beauty!

When I received this email entitled "Dieting" I was not quite ready to be confronted with such blatant mockery of what lovely models should represent! In its stead are pictures of a lady who looks like she has been starved so much that protruding bones seem to dominate. While the skinny pictures of starving children reveal eyes that mirror acute pain and suffering, yet the sunken eyes of this model seem to glow with pride and a smile that says, "Look, thin is beautiful!"

I would not blame the thoughts of the model for we have been told that people who suffer from anorexia nervosa have a distorted view of their actual body size. They perpetually think they are fat, even when their cells are crying out for oxygen and nourishment. I am annoyed with the photographer and all those organisers who seem to endorse that thin is beautiful. Have they not counselled the models that it is dangerous to be too grossly underweight for they might just collapse and die anytime.? Or have their counsel fallen on deaf ears?

I remember a young student was brought to me for counselling by her mother. Her mother had earlier told me that her fourteen year old daughter used to be cute and chubby. I was not quite prepared for what greeted me. The protruding cheek bones of the girl stood out so prominently that they made her cheeks look even more hollow, making her look like a woman in her seventies! My right hand could even clasp her arms. Her skin was dry and scaly. I was speechless. I was filled with compassion for this poor young girl and I burst into tears and just hugged her. Later, I made a glass of milo and fed her spoon by spoon. To my relief she finished the whole glass of milo. I sensed that it was no point talking to her for countless people must have advised her against her excessive dieting. Slowly, she ate some wheat biscuits, all the time staring into space, and sometimes staring into my tearful eyes. Next morning, at breakfast time, she ate some porridge. Gradually, she started eating. Her parents were overjoyed. It was my first confrontation with someone suffering from anorexia nervosa, and it was God who helped her. I was only an instrument to encourage her. My tears of helplessness and compassion must have finally moved her and given her the awakening. Gradually, she put on some weight, and began to learn the healthy way to diet.

I hope that family members and everyone are not overly critical about the physical makeup that they see in themselves and in others. We must always remember that people cannot help looking the way they look. Who does not want to be beautiful and handsome? One of my students was jeered at for being overweight. His classmates poked fun at his chubbiness. One day he decided to lose 30 lbs. in 3 months, and he would come to school with no money or packed lunch. Thankfully, he stopped his intense dieting after he achieved his target loss of 30 lbs. or he could be on the verge of developing anorexia nervosa.

Good looking people must be thankful that they have been endowed with great features and physique, and hence refrain from disdaining those less endowed. Instead of emphasising on external beauty, parents should focus more on nurturing their children with life skills and character building. All of us should also decide what is most important to us than mere looks and beauty for example, great health, happiness, family, friends and work fulfillment.

Gan Chau

An Average Lady Am I!

I was looking through my old documents. I came across a printed testimonial given by my Form Five teacher, Mrs. C.H. Lee, from Convent Green Lane Secondary School dated 2nd December 1970. I smiled when I saw that I had a 3 which means average + grading for academic ability, reliability, initiative, courtesy, attitude to work, social adjustment, organising ability and other aspects. 4 is average and 5 is below average. 2 is very good while 1 is outstanding. Hence I am right in between outstanding and below average!

I also came across my Certificate of Participation for the 1987 First Vertical Marathon, running up 1,336 steps to the top of the then tallest hotel in the World, The Westin Stamford. I clocked in 23 minutes. I remember the fastest was a lady who clocked in 9 minutes, while the slowest was a lady who did it in 59 minutes. Again I was in the average position!

I am reminded of Professor Higgins in the movie, "My Fair Lady", when he proudly and confidently asserted, "An average man am I! There is something quite comforting about being average in everything. Not being the competitive type, I am quite contented to be somewhere in the middle, where there are people below my position and there are people above me. I remember throughout primary and secondary school, I had always hovered around the 10th to the 15th position in class.... again an average student in a class of 30 students! It can be quite stressful to be in the top position because a lot of hard work and determination are required to remain at the top. The only time when I desired to be top was when I joined essay writing competitions. Papa was quite poor, and it meant a lot to me to be able win the top three positions for it translated into earning cash prizes for excellent articles!

Being average puts me in a humble position. Perhaps some of you may disagree and like my school principal, Sister Adrian, had always said, "You need to try to be at the top so that should you fall, at least you will not fall so low!" My contention is that if you were to fall from a greater height, the pain would be even more excruciating! Hence, I am still happy and contented to remain in mid position so that should I fall, it would not be so painful for me. From midpoint, I can look up and enjoy the clear blue skies, and I can also have a clearer view of the green, green grass. An average lady am I! And happy and contented will I be!

Gan Chau

The Big Contests! International and Table Topics!

 

The eloquent participants for District 80 International Speech Contest!

 

A battle of wits, speed and coherence - Table Topics Contestants - Men of Substance!

 

Salsa Dancing at Closing Ceremony

 

Farewell Buffet Lunch. With 2nd Runner-up of Table Topics Contest, Saengchai Lee from Thailand.

I had planned to wake up at 6.00a.m. so that I could reach Suntec City by 7.00a.m. Instead, horror upon horrors, I woke up at 5 mins to 8a.m.! I sprang up, and like lightning, I was all dressed up in 5 mins. I grabbed my bags and dashed down the 5 flights of stairs onto Racecourse Road to hail for a cab. Funny how cabs don't seem to be around when you need them! I managed to reach the Theatre at 8.15a.m. and luckily found a vacant seat on the 5th row. Whew! I would never miss the highlight of the Convention - District 80 International Speech and Table Topics Contest - where the cream of champions from Singapore, Hongkong, Macau and Thailand would meet! As Ed Hearn had said, all the contestants are already winners for they have the courage to try! During the break, we all had a difficult time guessing the winners for all of them are excellent speakers!

The question for Table Topics Contest was "Are You Smart Enough?" I had never heard such excellent and profound answers to such a simple question from one of the contestants whom I thought might garner the first prize! But instead he came in first runner up! I guess there is always that little element of subjectivity in judging. Our hearts went to one contestant from Hongkong who had misheard the word smart to be small. How I wished he had verified with the Contest Chair if he was not sure of the pronunciation! Saengchai Lee from Thailand began with, "At first I thought the question asked me if I was small enough." He must be puzzled by the thunderous applause! Then he continued, "Look at my size and you get the answer!" "Since the question is "Are you smart enough? Yes, I am".
The audience laughed. Thai is his mother tongue and he only picked up some English in High School. It was not enough for he had to study on his own after high school. He was witty and charming...and ended with, "I now have a group of people working for me. Hence, now I am smarter than smart".

Can I imagine myself up there on stage in future? I had only won two champion prizes at Area level during my first year as a club member. It definitely takes a lot of courage and hard work to reach District and International Levels. I take my hat off to all these young contestants on stage! You have so many years before you to work hard and become an international champion. We certainly hope that one day, there will be an International Speech contest winner from District 80! Ed Hearn believes that we can make it if we don't give up!

Cheers to all toastmasters from District 80! Let us all work hard and continue to have the courage to try and try and try!

Thanks to Tay Ying Ping and Michael Rodrigues and their team for putting up a wonderful convention that is really MAD - Memorable, Alluring and Amazing and full of Dynamite!

Gan Chau