My Parents' "Most Blessed Mistake"!

After having had six children, my parents thought six would be enough. However, six years later, I came into the world!! My parents considered me their mistake, but papa considered me his "most blessed mistake"! You see, I am the "durian" of his eyes! In Britain, they would call it "apple."

No wonder when I went out with my parents, people would often wonder who I was, and when told I am the youngest, many would comment "Oh! So cute!" Once, mother was annoyed with me, and told me half in anger and half in jest, that I was picked up from the rubbish dump. Naive as I was, I believed her.! Papa hugged me and assured me that I am his most precious daughter and God's gift to him and mama. How comforting to a child!

That was my papa. Though educated in Chinese, and steeped in Chinese Literature and History, he was quite westernised in his approach. The older generation of Chinese fathers are usually not vocal or demonstrative in their affection for their children. They would work hard and provide well for their families and many of my friends told me that they had never heard words of affection from their fathers.
Without a shadow of doubt, these fathers love their children in their hearts, but they often hide their affection beneath a wall of stern expression!

Papa was unique.... a man in a million. When he came back from school on his motor bike, he would holler out to me, "Where is my precious daughter? There, you are!" He would then hug me and stretch out his hand with his palm closed. "Guess, what is in papa's hand?" "Play or eat one, papa?" I would ask in excitement. "Play"

"Is it an eraser? A little toy? A marble? A small rubber ball? A hair clip?" Papa shook his head, and opened up his palm. It was the smallest dictionary in the world.... a two inch by one inch dictionary! I just loved the little book. Papa enjoyed surprising his children. Even though we were not rich, we were extremely happy and contented.

Mama always lamented that she could not understand the need for her daughters to receive so much education. After all they would end up getting married and be housewives one day. But papa was of a different mind. He reasoned that it would be just as important for girls to be well educated, so that in the event, if their husbands turn out to be irresponsible fathers, they could help to provide for their families.

I could never forget the words of wisdom that papa shared when I grew up and could understand what he said. I was in Secondary One.

"My precious child. Papa loves you and worries about you the most...for you are so much younger than your siblings. You are most like me in character, for you are generous and overly soft hearted. However, one day, God chided me and reminded me that if I, an ordinary man and father, could love his children so much, how much more would He, as the Heavenly Father and creator of everything in this world. If He could take care of the wild flowers and the birds of the air, would He not take care of everything! I repented and began to commit all my children to God's wonderful hands. I will do my best as an earthly father, but the great Heavenly Father could do so much more for my chidlren. Papa will give you and your siblings the best love a father can give.... I give you all the best education I can afford, but papa will not be able to leave you all with properties and lots of money for inheritance. You will all grow up to be confident adults and God will bless my children richly."

Yes, Papa did not leave us much with material things. When he passed away, he only had $5,000/-. But he had left his children with a great legacy of love by his fine examples of concern and compassion, hospitality and charity. From the huge turn out at his funeral wake and procession, he had touched lives from all walks - from the poorest to the richest and from the illiterates to highly educated. Big burly gangsters from our village and ex-criminals came to his wake, weeping unabashedly.
Papa was as comfortable with hooligans as he was with high ranking government officials!

I would encourage all parents to emulate my papa. Sometimes parents love their children to the extent that they idolise their offsprings without even realising it. If you, as ordinary parents, could give good things to your children, how much more would God the Heavenly Father who loves each and every of His creation.

Papa was absolutely right! God indeed has not only blessed papa's children, but He has blessed them abundantly.

Gan Chau