Sunday, April 19, 2009

Beautifully Imperfect!

Wow! A contest for the most beautifully imperfect couple! I love the words, "beautifully imperfect!" This pair of words is the best oxymoron to me. An oxymoron is a combination of contradictory or incongruous words. Words like bitter sweet and cruel kindness for example.

I quickly phoned my best friend, Soh Wah and told her about the contest and even encouraged her to join because I think she and her husband are the most beautifully imperfect couple I have known.

Soh Wah is a life wire. She is full of enthusiasm and excitement most of the times. In sharp contrast her husband Yew Tien is cool and calm, and tends to be quiet. He is a man of few words. When Soh Wah went to visit Penang, I gave them my second brother's contact, as I wanted my brother to take them out for a nice meal. There are certain places in Penang which only the locals know of and which are seldom known to tourists. Brother aptly described Soh Wah as a microphone and her husband as a tape recorder. She sings and he records! Well, I won't spoil the fun because I want Soh Wah to write for herself.

Perhaps we can extend this practice of discerning the beauty of imperfection in people around us. Then there would be less judging of books by their covers. Then there would be less cynicism and antagonism when Susan Boyle first entered the stage. My friend Geok Cheng told me that there had been talks that perhaps Susan should have a make-over. Geok Cheng, including myself are severely against it. Susan and her current "gong gong" (less bright) look and simple frankess endear her to those who could see the beautiful imperfection in her. Somehow people who look like "tua leng gong" have a special attractiveness about them and they are lovable. They make people around them feel safe and accepted. I am also one of the fortunate "tua leng gong". Second Sister once told me that I did not look like a graduate from overseas when I was running around with my little nieces and nephews all over Malacca in pants and sneakers and a cap. I began to wonder what a graduate should look like! Should have I walked with an "air of know it all" or should I have looked more business like in suits? She told me that it is only when I speak that people begin to realise that I have substance, but the problem is that I tend to be somewhat reticent with people I just get to know. Ah forget it! The weather is so humid and hot that I have often wished I could wear singlet or go without any tops like my papa and brothers!

I remember when I was younger and perhaps more conscious of my looks, I had wanted to lose weight drastically. However, my best friend, Ching, stopped me and said that if I were to lose a lot of weight, I would no longer be the Choo Choo she knew. It would just not be me. Somehow being slim did not appear congruent with my bubbly personality!

Of course, today if ever I had to lose some weight, it is because of health factors. I remember a good old buddy from Malaysia called Pit. Pit is an attractive lady...fairly tall with a lovely round face and beautiful jet black hair. However, if you were to analyse her features one by one, you would think her nose is somewhat too flat, her eyes a little too small and her lips could be improved on. Yet, when these imperfection of features were put together, she actually looks quite pretty and attractive overall. I believe her inner beauty of kindness and compassion has enhanced and given her that radiance and charm that make others like her almost instantly.

Hence, when our imperfection is blended in with others as well, then things don't seem so imperfect after all. Wed may end up looking good because of the support and encouragement given to us.

I wish the all the beautifully imperfect couples good luck and all the very best.! May your marriage and relationship bloom even more beautifully with each passing year.

Gan Chau


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